How Important is Character to Your Success?

How
Important is Character to Your Success?

One of the
25 most important lessons I’ve learned.

By Dave Kahle

A refined character is the
ultimate path to success and fulfillment. That is one of the 25
most important lessons I’ve learned.

           A
little background.  I’ve been a
consultant/speaker/trainer for over 30 years, having worked with more than 500
B2B sales forces.  Recently, one of my
clients suggested that I compile a list of the 25 most important lessons I’ve
learned and write about each.   Pursuing that
idea, I came up with a long list. To narrow it down, I applied these criteria
to the list:

           1.
It had to be an important lesson – one which has the potential to dramatically
affect a person, a sales team, or a business — not superficial or trivial.

           2.  It had to arise out of my personal
experience.  In other words, not
something that I garnered from a book, or borrowed from someone else. Something
I’ve learned in the trenches.  

           3.  It had to have been tested in the caldron of
real-world experience.  No blue-sky
stuff.

           4.  I had to unwaveringly vouch for its
validity.  These are concepts and lessons
that I would stand behind.

           Using
that process, I reduced the list to 25.  In
no particular order of priority, I have finished several, and you can find the
links at the bottom of this post.  Here’s
the next on the list: “A refined character is the ultimate path to
success and fulfillment.”

           Let’s
begin by defining what we mean by a refined character.

           Character,
according to Google, is defined as “the mental and
moral qualities distinctive to an individual. ’ We often refer to these
“qualities of character” as character traits. 
These words refer to our habitual behavior, and consist of our thoughts,
feelings, and attitudes, evidenced in the choices we make.   

           Think of
one’s character as personality – the way a person habitually acts. So, one can
be outgoing, for example, honest or deceptive, proud or humble, thankful or
resentful, and so on.  The combination of
the individual traits come together to form a person’s character. Everyone,
therefore, has a unique character.

           While much of
our character develops in our childhood, at some point in our development we
can decide to intentionally acquire certain desirable traits. We are not
bystanders in the development of our character. 
If we are shy, for example, we don’t have to continue to be.  We can choose to change.

           But change is
difficult and, unfortunately, most people don’t pursue it. James Allen said:

           “Men are often interested in improving their circumstance,
but are        unwilling to improve
themselves, they therefore remain bound.”                                              

            A refined character is a set of traits that have been
intentionally built into one’s personality. 
But not just any traits.  Over
generations, wise and thoughtful people have defined a set of traits that are
more admirable, more conducive to success and fulfillment than others. The
Bible, for example, encourages Christians to develop a set of traits it calls
the ‘fruit of the spirit”:

              ²² But
the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance,
kindness, goodness, faithfulness, ²³ gentleness and
self-control. Against such things there is no law.
Galatians     5:22-23, NIV

           There are other lists, but this is a
good starting point.  The idea is that
these character traits will lead to a life of fulfillment and impact, and that
they are attainable via a joint effort of God’s spirit and us.

           One of the core strategies to live a
successful life, then, is to develop a higher set of traits — to pursue a
refined character. From time immemorial, wise and thoughtful people have
agreed.  You may recall that Martin
Luther King said,

           I have a
dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they
will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their
character. 

           But it seems
that in recent years the acknowledgement of the power of a refined character
has been jettisoned in favor of an emphasis on far more superficial
characteristics.  We are encouraged to
hire people, not on the basis of their character and knowledge, but on the
basis of their skin tone, ethnic background or gender.  We are told to celebrate, not the
accomplishments of self-discipline and commitment, but rather one’s sexual
proclivities.  We’ve abandoned character
as the standard.

           At every
level of our society, the consequences are huge. 

           For
individuals, the drive to seek success and fulfillment in external
circumstances prevents, as James Allen said 100 years ago, our developing a
refined character.  As long as our
circumstances are someone else’s fault, we’ll never accept the responsibility
to improve ourselves. We abandon personal responsibility to become a better
person. The result is a lifetime of frustration and bitterness.      

                     Watch
your thoughts:  They become words.

                     Watch
your words:  They become actions.

                     Watch
your actions:  They become habits.

                     Watch
your habits:  They become character.

                     Watch
your character:  It becomes your destiny.

           In businesses
and organizations, the purpose gets lost in the drive for diversity.  It is no longer the organization’s focus to
be the best by delivering high quality services and products driven by
motivated people, but rather to look inward and focus on the superficial characteristics
of the workforce.   When becoming the best
is no longer pursued, one naturally defaults to mediocrity. 

           As an outsider looking into over 500 sales forces, I’ve
observed that, in spite of the rhetoric of the politicians, talking heads and
social media mavens, character counts. 
The best salespeople are high character individuals.  The best sales managers are motivated by ‘fruit
of the spirit type” motivations.  And the
best companies are directed by high character people.

           Those who focus
on outside circumstances and blame someone else for their issues inevitably
sink to mediocrity and often bitterness and frustration. You can’t build a
successful business with employees who think of themselves as victims. 

           While
government can tolerate (and maybe even encourage) mediocrity, and while institutions
can accommodate a percentage of their employees who aren’t interested in
character, business has no margin for the mediocre.  A business that doesn’t understand and encourage
a refined character is doomed to mediocrity and eventual demise. 

           At the level of our society, when we abandon a refined character
as the value for which we strive, we take a step backward.  We become more like the Middle Ages, when emotional
rhetoric ruled, and a person was treated on the basis of his/her birth instead
of their accomplishments. It took hundreds of years in the development of
mankind to move beyond that. 
Unfortunately, our abandonment of character is a step backward.  It is not surprising that on almost all
measures of a healthy society, the USA is moving downward toward mediocrity.

           That’s why one of the most important lessons I’ve learned in 30 years of
consulting is “A refined character is the ultimate path to success and fulfillment.”

           You
may want to review these other posts: 

Manifesto:  One bold step to lead your team to higher
levels
The
Character of Successful Salespeople
Character and
business success
Business
model or leadership character?
The Role of
Adversity in Shaping a Person’s Character

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